I was Gone and Now I'm Back

I'm sure that is a lyric from a song but for the life of me I can't remember which one! Anyhoo, it neatly sums up my blog absence in one sentence.

Basically, I haven't not been trying to lose weight, it just hasn't been my main focus for the past few months (some relationshippy-stuff got in the way) but now the tides have turned and out of everything I have realised that I am the only person who can make myself happy, truly happy. And I'm feeling better about everything already!

After a layoff of a few months I made my grand re-entrance to la gym (well I may have exaggerated slightly - I just ended up trudging in all bleary eyed and hating myself for getting up so early). I have started the C25K plan for the six millionth time - I swear I will finish it one day!

That afternoon whilst in work I perused the gym timetable and saw my much beloved Zumba class was a) now free (GET IN!!) and b) was now on twice a week (DOUBLE GET IN!) So that evening I trudged back to the gym for the second time that day to get my Zumba-on. I bloody loved it! There is a new tutor (who I love) but she did seem content to kill us by making us do every type of squat to one song! But then anything to 'downsize' the thighs - I'm all over it!!

With the C25K plan being based over 3 days per week, the Zumba classes fit in perfectly to fill in the two other days. I also would like to try the pilates class on a Saturday morning (didn't make it today but ended up doing a killer pilates DVD in its place). So my proposed workout schedule will look something like this:

Monday: C25K.
Tuesday: Zumba class.
Wednesday: C25K.
Thursday: Zumba class.
Friday: C25K.
Saturday: Pilates class or DVD.
Sunday: Thy day of rest!

Let me know your exercise plan - because I'm nosey like that ;)

I Don't Want It Enough

I like to think I'm pretty honest with myself. Whether I'm feeling motivated enough to get up at 6am before work and sweat it out down the gym or I've thought "eff it!" and ate and drank exactly what I've felt like, I've been honest with it all on this blog.

After reading countless other blogs and fitness/weight loss websites/resources I've come to the conclusion that I obviously don't want to lose weight enough. I don't want it enough.

As my post history shows I'm highly emotional and swing from being focused and driven to lost and miserable within a few days. If I wanted this enough then I would be more consistent and focus on my goals. I would give it my all.

I'm doing it all half-assed which means I take one step forward and two steps back.

I'm not moaning about it, I'm just being honest with myself.

In the past when I have felt like this I've made a plan of attack for the week to get myself back in the groove but I think I need to change things up. I can't do what I've been previously doing as I can't sustain it, I get bored. I don't yet know how I'm going to change things up. But I need to think of something soon as I refuse to end this year having made no progress from the last.

Time for a new plan of attack.

What a Week...

Well what a week it's been! Aside from the gorgeous weather there has been lots of potential pitfalls that I think I have done really well to avoid.

Firstly there was the England match on Wednesday where we had a fridge full of beer awaiting us at work, plus a BBQ. I went to the canteen and got a rice and cous cous salad and was full so didn't feel tempted to have a greasy burger.
Then we went for our customary 'drunken noodles' this afternoon - but thai food is relativley low points (for an eating out cuisine) and I had two small glasses of wine with it.

I went to the gym Sunday-Wednesday so worked up more than enough points to cover me this afternoon, plus I must have saved over a days worth of points (from not going over my allowance). Haven't been gym today or yesterday and I am missing it a bit. Feel like I should go both days over the weekend but I may be going out tomorrow and the England game is Sunday. I must aim to go Sunday morning - WITHOUT FAIL!!

Got my weigh in on Sunday and I really hope I am at that 16st mark (or under) as it seems to be taking ages to crack that barrier! Must persevere.

Oooh, in other news I tried my ASOS black skinnies on this morning (as I couldn't bear the double-denim look) and they fit!! I would also go as far as to say the were roomy round the stomach and waist - and just very snug around my lower legs -but still comfortable. Very, very pleased with that result. Will set myself a new aim to get into some size 18 ASOS trousers (As I need some new work pants).

Anyways, it's time to chill out, watch some world cup footy and enjoy the end of the week :)