Be Nice Now!

After my rant-filled post last week, and some very kind comments, I decided I just needed a break. A break from myself and my negative Nelly thoughts. This weekend I treated myself to a big Primark shop (I literally bought a whole new wardrobe!) and I arranged to meet a friend I'd not seen for a while in town for some lunch, drinks and a laugh. Just the kind of weekend I needed :)

So now, I need to come at things differently. Fed up days are always going to occur, but I cannot allow myself to feel that pent up about things when I don't exercise. I have to regain some positive momentum and get into a routine.

I haven't worked it all out and I don't have all the answers for myself but I am definitely feeling much better now. I'm going to re-read my PMA Week posts and see what I can learn from myself (I do talk sense sometimes!)

Round and Round and Round and Round

Sometimes your attempt to maintain a positive outlook gets broken down by the smallest negative thought. Once that kernel of negativity seeps through a whole wave of "AND I can't do this either" and "this isn't right about me as well" crashes over you and pulls you under.

After a mad busy day at work and feeling tired I came home and wanted to crash. Instead of chilling out I decided to hula hoop for half an hour - burn some cals, y'know. Now whether it was because I was just too tired or not, for some reason me and my hoop were not being friends, and by this I mean the bloody thing kept falling to the floor! I'm not an expert at it but I'm usually good enough to keep it going for a few mins before having to restart. Last night? Nope, about 20 seconds was my longest spin before it hit the floor (and my shins and ankles on the way!)

I persevered through a frustrating half an hour and just felt so annoyed and negative afterwards. It's funny how such a small thing could make me feel so bad but that bad hoop session seemed to encapsulate everything I'm trying to break free from. How I don't feel good enough, how my weight impairs me having fun.

I really do need to work on not letting something so small alter my mood. I gave my hoop some evils this morning! I'm going to fetch it in a minute and attempt another 30 mins. It will not beat me again!

This may be aiming a bit too high! I'll settle for keeping it up for more than 5 mins first!

Feeling Like a Rockstar Part One

As mentioned yesterday, this week is going to be my biatch. I'm going to attack it with such revved up positive intentions, the likes of which not seen since my festival weekends!

This morning my alarm went off early and after a few initial thoughts of sacking it off, I got ready for the gym to complete my second week of the C25K. I ATTACKED that walk/run, spurred on by the joggers surrounding me. I felt really powerful and finished strong.

I got ready for work in the changing rooms and put on the outfit I had picked out last night-  green peg leg trousers, a nude coloured pussy bow blouse and a gorge floaty cappuccino-coloured Topshop shrug. I had been wary of wearing my new trousers outside of the house as they are high waisted so you have to tuck the top in or else you look to top heavy -therefore making a feature of my waist (good) but then people will be looking at my tummy area (bad). Well I plucked up the nerve to wear them to work and I have never got so many comments about looking nice in work as I have today. I felt like a rockstar!

Today was the best Monday I've had in a while. C'mon Tuesday - I'm ready for you! :)

It is so ON this week!

The clocks have gone forward. Spring has sprung. It's the beginning of a new week and I am well and truly revved up for it. C'MOOOOON!

I weighed in this morning and have lost the 6lbs I put on over my holiday the week before last, so am now back to 15st 2lbs - where I was pre-holiday. I'm sure those 6lbs were just scared off by the sheer force of my positive attitude this week (on and maybe a few gym visits!)

My gym bag will be packed tonight ready for the beginning of a arse-kicking week! I am still following the C25K plan (and still loooving it!) but after a bit of fannying around of schedules I'm going to re-start the second week tomorrow so I can still schedule in the proper rest days.

I'm going to try and maintain my PMA (positive mental attitude) - particularly in work - as being negative about everything, and myself, is just too tiring.

Bring it on week because I'm ready for ya!

As well as the C25K I'm also going to be re-visiting my Thursday night Zumba class (as we now have a new instructor).

I've also been thinking about mixing things up and keeping things fun (another thing I'm trying to abide by - making exercise fun) possibly buying a hula hoop. Does anybody else hula? I love it on the Wii Fit so might treat myself to one this week.

I wish you all top week. Go get 'em my lovelies!!

Quick Thoughts

• I am feeling positive.
• I am feeling strong and confident.
• I will reach my weight loss goal.
• I will experience all my life goals.
• The only thing that holds me back from doing/feeling the above is me.
• I am going to be my own best friend as being mean to myself does not do ANY good.
• I am going to try and live by the old adage "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" - even when it comes to ridiculous/annoying/infuriating/horrible people.
• Getting fit and enjoying exercise is more important than the number on a scale.
• Motivation is not an actual 'thing' - you either do something or you don't.
• Waiting around for the magical motivational moment is futile (see above point).
• I am slightly obsessed with reading stories/looking at old photos of Elizabeth Taylor.
• I like short bullet point lists.